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New Feature! Sudoku below Horoscopes and Ledge, play online or print it out!



ARIES (March 21-April 19): Travel, intrigue and gaining worldly experience are highlighted. What you do and who you meet along the way will have an impact on your life. Challenges will reveal how much you know and how well you can adapt. Love is in the stars.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Too much of anything will not bode well for you. Stick to a pace you know you can handle and refuse to try and keep up with someone who has unrealistic goals. Your stability will be rewarded in the end.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Don't sit still when you can accomplish so much. Favors will be granted and opportunities will pop up where least expected. Put love on a pedestal and show someone you fancy a good time. Your generosity will bring high returns.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Don't take offense if someone says something inappropriate. You are best to focus on doing your own thing and avoiding any sort of joint effort that is likely to lead to you doing all the work.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): The effort you put into your home, family or surroundings will bring huge benefits. Doing as much of the work as you can will result in compliments, not to mention savings. Romance should be planned for the evening hours to celebrate your accomplishments.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Look out for your interests and avoid getting sucked into helping others at a high cost. You have to be practical even if it makes someone angry. Giving in to demands will lower your self-esteem and lead to loss.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Help is on the way. Lend a helping hand and get the same in return. It's a give-and-take day with a change of heart that will lead to greater happiness, not to mention future opportunities. Love is on the rise.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): You are best to go it alone. Don't expect anything from anyone and you won't be disappointed. Let your creative imagination wander and you will discover something that will spark an innovative and prosperous idea. Home is your safe haven.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Do your research and explore avenues that entice you. Form a strong alliance with someone who has as much to offer as you do. Romance will improve your relationship. A move or updating your surroundings will improve your situation.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Keep a low profile and a tight watch over your money and possessions. Be aware of what the people around you do or say. Delays while traveling can be expected and problems with friends and relatives anticipated.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Personal, financial or legal deals can be struck. Important relationships will reach new heights, allowing you to have greater maneuverability to do the things that make the most sense and mean the most to you. Romance is highlighted.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): You are best to stay under the radar and out of the limelight. The less said, the easier it will be to accomplish your goals and stabilize your situation. Less is definitely more when it comes to taking a risk.



Advice for Maury Povich Paternity- Test Guests:

• It’s Not a Tumor, It’s DiGiorno.

• Women: If you run off the stage crying, you should prob- ably be aware that the camer- as are going to follow you.

• Men: Go ahead and prom- ise to support the kid if you want; they never do fol- low-up shows to reveal who’s a deadbeat.

• Women: “He looks just like you” and “He don’t look nothin’ like [other man]” are not acceptable defenses. The kid is under 2 years old; he or she looks like a freakin’ baby.

• Men: It is probably unnec- essary to give details about how the woman was sleeping with other men. If you are denying paternity, that kind of implies you think there are other possible fathers. • Women: Do not use per- centages greater than 100 to indicate your certainty.

• Men: If the kid is obviously of a mixed racial parentage, but you and the mother are both white, milk that like it’s a prize-winning moo cow. • Women: If he is not the only man you have ever been with, then do not say the he is the only man you ever been with. If the test shows that he isn’t the father, you will come off looking like a liar (which, incidentally, you are.)

Andrew R. Juhl would like to thank his baby-daddy, Mike, for the idea for this Ledge.






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