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ARIES (March 21-April 19): Your desire to please will lead you into situations that make you feel that you are being taken advantage of. Learn to say no and to limit what you will do for others. Friendship at a cost isn't likely to last.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Get busy, and accomplish what you can instead of standing still and dwelling on what you cannot do. Emotions will run high, and they must be channeled properly if you want to avoid an unpredictable situation that is nearly impossible to fix.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Don't reveal personal information. Protect your ideas and plans for the future if you don't want to face meddling. Put your energy into making the personal changes that will make you feel good about who you are and the way you look.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Develop your creative ideas, and share your concerns with people you trust to help you make the necessary changes. Love is on the rise, and spending time with someone who shares your feelings will bring you closer together.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Keep a lid on what you plan to do next. The element of surprise will help you get what you want without interference. An emotional situation can lead to a costly turn of events. Protect your reputation and your assets.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Talks will lead to progress. The more you learn and interact with others, the further along you will be. Network, share your ideas, and put your plans in motion. There is money to be made along with personal improvements.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Pending legal, financial, or medical issues must be given top priority. Don't let the changes going on around you stop you from making the right personal choice for you. Improve your living arrangements any way you can.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Put more effort into learning and improving your surroundings. Building an area that is more convenient to achieving the goals you have set will help improve your confidence and inspire you to forge ahead. Romance is in the stars.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Make sure that whatever changes you make to your home or personal life are beneficial. You are likely to make a poor decision that can hurt your relationship with someone you've known a long time. Think twice before making a move.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Take a moment to enjoy your friends, family, and your domestic scene. Sticking close to home will give you the opportunity to make the little alterations that will bring you greater happiness. Share your joy with the ones you love.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Don't let temptation take over. Spend less, budget wisely, and focus on the changes you can make to cut corners while you improve your earning potential. It's all about hard work, good organization, and your desire to advance.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Share your ideas, and spend time with the people you know well and trust. Plan your course of action regarding an investment or project you want to pursue. Financial stabilization is within reach if you make the right choice.

Misheard sayings:

• "Let weeping dogs cry."

• "Love is a mini-splendored thong."

• "Music has charms to tooth the savage breast."

• "Snow shoes is good shoes."

• "Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and others have greatness thrust into of them."

• "The best offense is a good skunk fence."

• "The brass is always cleaner on the other slide."

• "To make an omelet, you've got to break a few legs."

• "See no weevil, hear no weevil, seek no weevil."

• "That's neither ear nor hair."

• "Two in a bird is worth the hand in the bush."

• "An Englishman's mom is his hassle."

• "You can't be tall things to tall people."

• "Fight fire with water."

• "Be still, my bleeding heart."

• "Don't eat you panties in a lunch."

• "A little college can be a dangerous thing."

• "Clothes only count in horseshoes and hand grenades."

• "Don't be a strangler."

• "In the land of the blond, the two-eyed man is king."

Andrew R. Juhl thinks cats has line knives. He doesn't know what that could mean, but he's still a little scared.

>> Click here to submit an event!

• Book Babies, 10:30 a.m., Iowa City Public Library, 123 S. Linn
• Hallelujah Chorus Sing-Along, noon, UIHC Colloton Atrium
• Chess Group, 1 p.m., Uptown Bill’s, 730 S. Dubuque
• Knitting Nurse, 2-4 p.m., Home Ec Workshop, 207 N. Linn
• First Friday Coffeehouse, Iowa Humane Alliance Fundraiser, 5:30 p.m., Beadology, 220 E. Washington
• Graduate College Commencement Ceremony, 7 p.m., Carver-Hawkeye Arena
Annie, 7:30 p.m., Iowa City Community Theater, Johnson County Fairgrounds, 4265 Oak Crest Hill Road
A Christmas Carol, City Circle, 7:30 p.m., Coralville Center for the Performing Arts, 1301 Fifth St.
• Tallgrass, Iowa Shares Benefit, 8 p.m., Englert, 221 E. Washington
• Item 9 & the Mad Hatters CD Release Party, 9 p.m., Gabe’s, 330 E. Washington
• Salsa, 9 p.m., Wildwood, 4919 Walleye N.E.
• Scholars and Tyrants, 10 p.m., Yacht Club, 13 S. Linn

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