|
New Feature! Sudoku below Horoscopes and Ledge, play online or print it out!



ARIES (March 21-April 19): Concentrate on the lesson. Go through the motions, but don't give in to manipulation. Discipline will be required, and a need to gauge your time carefully is a must. Do your best to get things done. There is no room for error.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Knowledge is key to making the right choice. Ask questions, and discuss your concerns. A partnership will help you see things from different angles. The moves you make now will determine how successful you will be in the future.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): You thrive under pressure. The chance to multitask and diversify allows you to show off and challenge others. Your ability to leap from one thing to another and to find solutions will keep you busy and out of trouble.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): You'll do well if you join in the fun and participate in unusual activities that broaden your outlook and bring you in touch with all sorts of interesting people. Express your desires, and you'll make a connection that will keep you occupied.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): You may not want to take care of domestic chores, but people will complain if you fall behind. Pick up the slack if someone else is to blame, and you will end up in control and out of trouble.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Choose what works best for you, and follow your basic instincts. Making contact with people who share common interests will bring you new opportunities. Network and combine business with pleasure. Romance will result in a better love life.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Extravagance, overindulgence, and taking on more than you can handle will lead to relationship problems. Work hard, produce the most and the best you can, and refrain from letting emotional matters slow you down. Protect your health and wellness.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): People from your past will surface, or you may make contact with someone you miss. Reconnecting will bring new opportunities, as well as memories, that will influence what you do in the future. Love is highlighted, and a trip is apparent.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Take a serious and conservative approach to whatever you do. Being hotheaded or pushy will work against you. It's time to make some positive alterations at home that will make your life easier and less stressful.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): You have more control than you think. Don't let the changes that someone else instills fluster you or cause you to react impulsively. Review what's happening, and take a well-thought-out, calculated position that will ensure your protection.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): You need to make decisions and choices that benefit you instead of doing what helps everyone else. Study your situation, and learn all you can to ensure that you have the information you need to excel. Put your needs first.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Keep busy and headed in a planned direction. You stand to make gains and win favors and recognition. A celebration will attract personal and professional interest. Don't be shy when it comes to accepting what you deserve.



Juhl 2024:

• Restaurant servers will no longer be allowed to ask if you've "eaten there before." Additionally, no restaurant will be allowed to have a menu so complicated that the average diner can't figure it out by simply reading it.

• A citizen will only be allowed to run a marathon if s/he signs a binding contract not to talk about it for three months before or after the date of that marathon.

• This whole "voting on Tuesdays" thing is utter horse crap; starting with my administration, we vote on the damn weekends, when people have free time and don't mind as much staying up late to see the results.

• I will abolish the death penalty. Henceforth, it shall be deemed the "estate penalty."

• We've been saving daylight in this country most years since 1918, and I say it's time we drill into those previously untapped reserves. By some estimates, this will give our nation's farmers an extra 700 days in the fields during my first term, vastly increasing our GDP and agricultural exports.

• Corporations are people, too. Thus, allow me to introduce my running mate: GlaxoSmithKline.

• Any person who finishes all 72 episodes of the You Don't Know Jack video game will automatically receive an A.A. in Comm. Studies from the University of Phoenix.

• Complaining about "not being to keep weight on" to person currently trying to lose weight will now be a cause for justifiable homicide.

Andrew R. Juhl is technically eligible for the presidency in FOUR MORE YEARS.






>> Click here to submit an event!

• Book Babies, 10:30 a.m., Iowa City Public Library, 123 S. Linn
• Hallelujah Chorus Sing-Along, noon, UIHC Colloton Atrium
• Chess Group, 1 p.m., Uptown Bill’s, 730 S. Dubuque
• Knitting Nurse, 2-4 p.m., Home Ec Workshop, 207 N. Linn
• First Friday Coffeehouse, Iowa Humane Alliance Fundraiser, 5:30 p.m., Beadology, 220 E. Washington
• Graduate College Commencement Ceremony, 7 p.m., Carver-Hawkeye Arena
Annie, 7:30 p.m., Iowa City Community Theater, Johnson County Fairgrounds, 4265 Oak Crest Hill Road
A Christmas Carol, City Circle, 7:30 p.m., Coralville Center for the Performing Arts, 1301 Fifth St.
• Tallgrass, Iowa Shares Benefit, 8 p.m., Englert, 221 E. Washington
• Item 9 & the Mad Hatters CD Release Party, 9 p.m., Gabe’s, 330 E. Washington
• Salsa, 9 p.m., Wildwood, 4919 Walleye N.E.
• Scholars and Tyrants, 10 p.m., Yacht Club, 13 S. Linn


In today's issue:





 
Privacy Policy (8/15/07) | Terms of Use (4/28/08) | Content Submission Agreement (8/23/07) | Copyright Compliance Policy (8/25/07) | RSS Terms of Use

Copyright © The Daily Iowan, All Rights Reserved.