|
New Feature! Sudoku below Horoscopes and Ledge, play online or print it out!



ARIES (March 21-April 19): Take patterned steps toward your goal. If you veer off course, it will be difficult to resume your direction. A love relationship or a self-improvement project will not turn out well if you don't compromise. Work hard; be practical.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Don't let emotional turmoil build or cause a problem between you and a partner. Do your best to take care of personal business and to learn all you can before embarking on a new endeavor. A practical approach will pay off.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Dealing with financial, medical, or legal institutions will be beneficial. Collect data conducive to fixing an unsavory situation. Too much talk and not enough action will hurt your reputation. Be honest regarding what you can and cannot do.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Put effort into home, family, and getting along with the people you deal with most. Discuss your plans openly, but don't let your emotions interfere with a good decision or making a necessary change.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Go where the action is. Your dynamic approach to dealing with others as well as your responsibilities will be impressive. Anger is a waste of time, but success will bring you satisfaction and make the people who anger you the most envious.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Take action, achieve your goals, and gain the respect of onlookers. Take advantage of any opportunity to prove you are capable of handling any situation. Romance is present, and it should be pursued during the evening hours.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Don't let love cost you. Whether dealing with a partner, parent, or child, you must not give in to demands that are impossible to meet. Bide your time, and focus on making the changes that will help you expand your interests.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Spend time with people you love or doing something entertaining. A challenging activity will give you the chance to impress someone special. A career move will turn out better than anticipated.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Money matters may be a little disconcerting. Check your personal finances, and get back on track regarding your debts and collections. You will have to work hard at getting along with your peers and resolving problems that arise.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Good things come to those who wait. Make changes that will help you gain ground personally and professionally. Your ability to take charge and do with ease whatever needs to be done will impress someone looking for services you can offer.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Observation is a must if you want to avoid turmoil. You will face opposition if you are too intent on doing things your way. Spend more time at home taking care of your personal, financial, and emotional needs. Honesty is a must.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): A partnership can help you get ahead, but first you must clear the air and share information that might change the dynamics of your relationship. Open and honest discussions will help seal a deal.

 

 

 

 


Life is like a box of chocolates …

• … decidedly more expensive the month before Christmas.

• … sometimes smooth, sometimes sticky, sometimes bumpy, and sometimes you encounter a nut.

• … by the time you're done with it, you just want to sleep.

• … a lot more complicated if you can't read instructions.

• … it'll make you choke sometimes.

• … more fun coming in than going out.

• … better with some decent wine.

• … except that it's not a box and not made of chocolate.

• … a surprise gift that's not always appreciated.

• … only truly wasted if thrown away before it's finished.

• … the fatter you are, the shorter it lasts.

• … only truly enjoyable for a maximum of three days.

• … less expensive at Walmart, but also worse.

• … the French think they do it better.

• … purchasable on the Internet.

• … old ladies have them, but you don't want the ones that old ladies have.

• … you shouldn't take it from a stranger.

• … if you come to it late, all that's left is are the hardest options.

• … of very slight comfort to the homeless.

• … it's a bad idea to leave a child with one unsupervised.

• …the best chunks often go to children.

• …rife with spaces that could be filled with chocolate.

• … the crappiest ones last the longest.

• … it lasts longer if you know how to keep your mouth shut.

• … you probably won't need a knife, but it also probably wouldn't hurt.

• … more fun late at night than in the morning.

• … not as harmful if you brush your teeth and exercise regularly.

• … if it lasts too long, it gets stale.

• … eventually, you're gonna eat it.

Andrew R. Juhl likes the cherry ones.













 
Privacy Policy (8/15/07) | Terms of Use (4/28/08) | Content Submission Agreement (8/23/07) | Copyright Compliance Policy (8/25/07) | RSS Terms of Use

Copyright © The Daily Iowan, All Rights Reserved.