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ARIES March 21-April 19 Group activity will help you gain confidence and will give you a chance to market your skills and present your ideas. People from your past can play a crucial role in helping you advance now. Romance will add spice to your life.

TAURUS April 20-May 20 Too much of anything will lead to disaster. Don't give in to someone asking for too much. You have to protect what you have from someone looking for a handout. Offer suggestions and hands-on help, not your hard-earned cash.

GEMINI May 21-June 20 You've got all the right moves. Take the initiative, and make changes that will ensure you the position you want or results that will make you more marketable. Changes made now will bring greater options. Love is on the rise.

CANCER June 21-July 22 Stay focused, and don't get sidetracked by what someone else does or says. Keep your thoughts to yourself, and refrain from upsetting any chance you have to reach a settlement or fix a pending problem. Think outside the box.

LEO July 23-Aug. 22 You have much to offer, and your enthusiasm will attract plenty of attention, but be careful — someone may take advantage of your vulnerability by offering you empty promises. Question everyone you deal with, both personally and professionally.

VIRGO Aug. 23-Sept. 22 Keep a close watch on what everyone is doing. You need to work hard and to stick to your plans, regardless of the temptations you come up against. Your biggest gain will come through your ability to finish what you start without complaint.

LIBRA Sept. 23-Oct. 22 A passionate approach to whatever you do will create greater popularity and spark the help that can put you ahead. Change is within reach, but you have to initiate what you want to see unfold. Don't wait; grab what you want, and keep moving.

SCORPIO Oct. 23-Nov. 21 Be creative with regard to your home and surroundings. You need a creative space if you are going to transform a good idea into a profitable venture. Don't let an emotional matter consume you. Follow your intuition, and move forward quickly.

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22-Dec. 21 Take on a task that requires your talents, and you will set yourself up for advance- ment. Alterations at home may seem daunting at first, but they will be beneficial in time. A good relationship is apparent if you strive for equality.

CAPRICORN Dec. 22-Jan. 19 Take a trip, or attend an event that opens your mind to a new way of using what you have to offer. There is money to be made, but you must avoid impulsive decisions — do your due diligence.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20-Feb. 18 Focus on improving your financial, emotional, or physical situation. What you set up now will lead to a better lifestyle. Be open about the way you feel to find out where you stand with the people you love most.

PISCES Feb. 19-March 20 Not everyone will have your best interests at heart. You have to carefully choose with whom you do business, or you may end up losing out financially. Deception or disillusionment is apparent when dealing with others. Ask direct questions. haute cuisine and lived to tell the tale.

 

 

 

 


English 'Cuisine':

Bubble and Squeak: leftover vegetables fried in bacon fat and also the noise you make choking it down.

Mushy Peas on Toast: comes pre-mushed in a can and looks the same coming up as it did going down.

Bangers and Mash: mealy sausages and mashed potatoes, best served in a hospital.

Mince and Mash: loose hamburger served over mashed potatoes, kind of like Maid Rite … but made wrong.

Bread Sauce: stale bread boiled with milk and onion, one step up from a bread and water diet.

Beef Drippings: congealed beef fat, sliced and spread on toast, otherwise known as "artery clogging manna from Heaven."

Yorkshire Pudding: Milk, flour, and egg cooked in beef fat. Not sweet, not pudding, not eating.

Jellied Eels: chopped eel boiled in broth and cooled to a jelly-like consistency, and you can't be quite sure if it's alive or dead as it slides down your throat.

Kippers: smoked or salted herring boiled for breakfast. Cooked twice, yet they still taste like dead fish.

Spotted Dick: steamed suet pudding and raisins. It's a dessert, not a disease.

Boiled Tongue: boiled cow tongue, peeled, and served cold. Just eat it, and don't talk back.

Christmas Mince Pie: minced meat, suet, candied fruits, and spices in pie crust, and like most things at Christmas, a deep disappointment.

Spaghetti on Toast: chopped canned spaghetti served on toast. Also known as the Meth-Addict Special.

— Duncan Stewart has eaten English haute cuisine and lived to tell the tale.













 
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