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ARIES March 21-April 19 Shake things up a bit. Incorporate something or someone from your past into your life and whatever you are pursuing. Love, travel, and communication coupled with overdue change will brighten your life, bringing you added benefits.

TAURUS April 20-May 20 Trust in what you know, not whom you know. Get your facts straight, and oppose any- one trying to take advantage of your skills, services, or talents. Don't let anger lead to problems with a cowork- er or inhibit your ability to advance.

GEMINI May 21-June 20 Don't let your emotions spin out of control. Arguments are likely to escalate into an irre- versible situation. Be honest with yourself and others regarding what you can do and who you are. Too much of anything will lead to trouble.

CANCER June 21-July 22 Rethink how you want to handle a sensitive situation. What you envision as workable is likely to fall short of your expectations. Complaining will make you look bad. Avoid getting involved in gossip or other people's problems.

LEO July 23-Aug. 22 Don't get sloppy when it comes to personal finance. Being overly generous may bring you compliments and boost your ego, but it will deflate your bankbook. You can do for others without spending money. Offer suggestions or hands-on help, not cash.

VIRGO Aug. 23-Sept. 22 Instability will plague you professionally or personally. Protect your position and status, and focus on the changes you need to make to remain current and technologically up-to-date. Precision and practicality will lead to a financial opportunity.

LIBRA Sept. 23-Oct. 22 Take on a challenge. Participate ? enjoy the competition and what you can gain from being involved. Love is on the rise, and it will enhance your personal life and your future lifestyle. Travel and social- ize.

SCORPIO Oct. 23-Nov. 21 Handle your money creatively. Do what it takes to invest in your talent, your skills, and your future. An interesting plan that can be launched from your home will succeed, as long as you stay within your budget. A physical change will pay off.

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22-Dec. 21 Size up your situation. Take an honest look at what you have created and what you must do to finish what you started. Love is in the stars, and partnerships will pay off because of the changes they bring about personally and professionally.

CAPRICORN Dec. 22-Jan. 19 Deal with colleagues and superiors very carefully. An impulsive judgment call can be costly. A wait-and-see approach, along with protecting your possessions, assets, and position, should be your prime concern. Listen and learn. Rely on experience.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20-Feb. 18 An interesting proposal can change your life if you jump at the chance to participate. Making changes to your home will add to your efficiency when it comes to turning one of your ideas into a pros- perous venture. Romance is in the stars.

PISCES Feb. 19-March 20 Keep your mind focused on your goals and what's expected of you. Stick to basics; keep things simple. Overdoing in any area of your life will throw your timing off. Less of everything will be beneficial in the end.

 

 

 

 


What's in Obama's wallet?:

• The real birth certificate from Kenya, not that cheapo Hawaiian forgery.

• Picture of Bo, the White House dog, inside the presidential limo.

• Louis Farakhan's Nation of Islam cell-phone number.

• $7 trillion IOU from George Bush for miscellaneous expenses in Iraq.

• Pocket copy of Karl Marx's Das Kapital.

• Al Green Fan Club membership card.

• $13.76

• 4 strips of "Ear Magic" flattening tape.

• Sexy photo of Michelle in a chador.

• $2 coupon for a carton of Marlboros.

• FBI report of Rick Santorum in bed with Rush … oops, that's secret.

• Clipping of article in which Romney says he'll "be better on gay rights than Ted Kennedy."

• Outline of second-term plan to institute Sharia law AND take away everybody's guns.

• GIS compass that automatically locates Mecca.

• Key to the only inside bathroom at Camp David.

• Hilly's home phone number.

Duncan Stewart has two library cards in his wallet.













 
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