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New Feature! Sudoku below Horoscopes and Ledge, play online or print it out!



ARIES (March 21-April 19): Don't let uncertainty be your nemesis. Size up both personal and professional partnerships, and make a choice to go it alone or collaborate. Walk away from anyone using unfair power plays. Discipline and diplomacy will lead to success.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): You'll find it difficult to stick to your plans. Your need to elaborate and turn everything into a big ordeal will hold you back. Taking small, secure steps will ensure that you reach your destination successfully.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): You'll upstage someone if you chat too much or push your methods on your peers, colleagues, or clients. Step back; consider the best way to proceed if you are dealing with others. Getting along will be half the battle.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Don't allow unpredictable actions to send you spinning in an unsuitable direction. Stand firm without deviating from your plans, and you will impress someone you consider special or who you want to do business with in the future.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Work at self-improvement and feeling good about the way you look and what you have to offer. Specialize in a service that allows you to use your skills in unusual ways. Don't allow anyone to alter your plans by using emotional blackmail.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Your enthusiasm will encourage others to join in and help you reach your goals. Opportunities are apparent, and communicating and expanding your original plans will bring a bigger return and greater satisfaction. You'll learn and advance quickly.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Avoid impulsive moves that can alter your personal or professional status. Play out any scenario you encounter with slow, methodical steps that will allow you the maneuverability to change your mind at your own discretion.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Showing emotion can be a good thing. Discuss your feelings so you can clear up the clutter in your personal life because of misinterpretation. If you don't share, you can't expect others to know what's wrong or how to fix it.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): It's payback time. If you want to help an organization or someone who needs assistance, now is the time to do so, but don't take chances. Do whatever is within your capability, and avoid too much travel. Love is highlighted.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): An unexpected change of plans must not disrupt your day. Prepare to go it alone if someone cancels on you. Investments or making changes to some of your assets will lead to greater returns. Home improvements or property transactions should be considered.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Get involved in a self-help group, or take the initiative to stop a bad habit. An emotional reaction will develop with someone if overindulgence, overspending, or a bad debt occurs. Community events will lead to favors and new friendships.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Put more thought into contracts, negotiations, and legal or financial matters. You will come up with a unique way to integrate your skills into a position or deal with an organization, institution, or agency trying to expand its current services.

 

 

 

 


Seven Action Films Reimagined as Independent Shorts, Based on Their Titles:

Mad Max: Mel Gibson fumes as an anti-Semite misogynist with road rage in a performance that is a real testament to his ability to pretend to be someone he definitely isn't.

Blade Runner: A fake documentary featuring a washed-up looking Harrison Ford recalling his brush with glory as an Olympic figure-skating alternate.

The Rock: Sean Connery and Nicolas Cage are embroiled in a vicious custody battle over their pet rock. (Shot from the point of view of the rock.)

Eraser: Arnold Schwarzenegger repeatedly scribbles and erases nonsensical messages to himself. The majority of the scenes are close-up shots of the eraser, underscoring the ephemeral nature of knowledge with the perseverance of forgetfulness.

Blade: Wesley Snipes cuts himself shaving, then contemplates the fragility of life as the camera slowly pans in for a time-lapse shot of the blood congealing on his razor.

Source Code: Jake Gyllenhaal is a scientist seeking the Entirely Encompassing Equation of Everything, and he is driven mad as a result. But was it the quest for the answer that drove him to insanity, or was it the answer itself?

The Grey: Liam Neeson stares into a mid-winter sky, contemplating a future wherein he will not exist, an eventuality simultaneously certain and unknown.

WILL HARTMAN works at the Bijou and craves neither adventure nor excitement.













 
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