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ARIES (March 21-April 19): Caution must be taken when dealing with health, financial, legal, or contractual matters. Don't be afraid to ask for what you want. Selling yourself short will be your downfall. Don't let emotions win over common sense. Question motives.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Travel, explore, and plan to have some fun. Entertaining, getting out with friends, or doing whatever it takes to enhance your love life will bring high returns and plenty more to look forward to in the future. Live, love, and laugh.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Don't make promises you cannot keep. Emotions will escalate, leaving you in a no-win situation. Expect to face criticism if you haven't been completely honest in your interpretation of something or someone. Old debts will be collected.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Don't make sudden moves that might disrupt your personal life. Focus on how you can make the most with what you've got, and you will gain greater stability, both at home and in your partnerships. Don't let past reservations hold you back now.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Play, try new things, and enjoy the company of people you find inspiring. Tie up loose ends quickly so you won't have anything hanging over your head. Having the freedom to enjoy life's little pleasures will pay off.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Expect to be emotional or to have to deal with people who are. Focus on self-improvement and getting along with everyone around you. You can learn a lot if you listen to complaints and do your best to fix what's wrong.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Take time to appease the people you live with in some small way without having to do something you don't want to do. Not everyone will be as insightful as you. A money matter can be resolved if you set up a new budget.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Home is where the heart is, and a little time and effort can make a huge difference to your surroundings. Don't let the past dictate what you can do now. Times have changed, and so have opinions. Follow your heart.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You'll be questioned if you are flippant about what you are up to. Back up your statements with facts, or prepare to change your mind and do what you are being asked to do. A past relationship will disrupt your life.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Help and be helped. It's simple: What you put out you will get back. Love is in the stars, and you can enhance your relationship by saying and doing what's right. An investment will give you security and ease your stress.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Don't give anyone reason to complain about what you are doing or how. Follow the rules. Finish what you start, and doors will open. You'll attract someone who is interested in forming a partnership. Stay within your means.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): It will be difficult to ignore someone tampering with your feelings. Don't retaliate. Instead, do your best, and let your actions be your voice. Steady progress will be the best revenge.

 

 

 

 


Roads signs we really need:

• Road Construction, of Which There is None Currently Taking Place

• It's a Road in Iowa: Just Expect Deer

• Speed Limit 85 (for Those of You Who Always Drive 15 Under)

• Slippery When Wet — Duuuuuuuuh

• Slower Traffic Take Another Route

• It's Asphalt, Not YOUR Fault

• Yield Before Zod.

• Did You Turn Off the Stove?

• Are You Sure?

• Stop. Then GO, Already.

• It's Just a Roundabout, Don't Make it More Complicated Than it Needs to Be

• It's Cheaper to Put Up This Dip Sign Than to Fix the Damn Dip

• Three-Way Stop Ahead; Not as Fun as it Sounds

• End Construction, Now.

— Brian Tanner never jaywalks. Sometimes he o-walks, but it never gets him anywhere.













 
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