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ARIES (March 21-April 19): Not everything will be visible. Step back, and observe what everyone else is doing. Don't let your heart rule your head, especially if money is involved. A good decision will be based on fact and practicality. Make your move cautiously.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Open your heart, and share your thoughts and plans for the future with someone you feel you can trust. The input you get will help you make up your mind and move forward. A chance to advance is more promising than you think.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Anger will mount if you are too pushy or you exaggerate the facts. An unexpected turn of events or last-minute change will leave you in the lurch. You'll have to think fast and cover up for something or someone.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Put love first. Whether it's love for someone special or for something you do, put in your best effort, and you will not be disappointed. You can stabilize your future if you are responsible and attentive. Protect your home, family, and partnerships.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Have fun, but don't overspend, or you will have regrets. A change of scenery or pace will lift your spirits. Getting together with people who can offer you information, adventure or a unique variation to your lifestyle will encourage positive change.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Bide your time, and hold your thoughts. Sharing your true feelings will only lead to an argument you cannot win. Focus on love, learning, and self-improvement, and look at your personal options. Love rules, anger loses.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Say what's on your mind. You may not please everyone, but you will have the edge when it comes to support. A change is inevitable, so don't fear the outcome. Be honest, elegant, and true to you. Money is on the way.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Love will bring insightful ideas and plans to the forefront. Share with someone you believe in and you will prosper. Be honest about your feelings, and don't let ulterior motives steer you in the wrong direction.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Don't get flustered by what others do or say. Pursue your own opportunities and don't look back. You don't need anyone else to bring about the changes that will put you in a better position for the future.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Opportunity knocks; be ready to take advantage of what's being offered. Alterations to your home or living arrangements look positive and can bring financial stability. Don't hesitate. Grab what's yours.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Let your imagination flow, especially when making changes at work that will allow you to get more done with better results. A partnership will inspire you to resurrect old ideas and plans. Don't let emotions hold you back.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Stick to your priorities, and forget about emotional temptation. You have to do a good job for the right reasons. Ulterior motives and dishonesty are present in you or someone else and should be monitored carefully.

 

 

 

 


Thoughts I've had while donating plasma:

• Why are all the hot phlebotomists taken?

• I hope that beef stick is still in my system.

• Jeepers, man! You tryna dig to China through my arm?

• Why do I have to answer these same questions every time? You seriously think I might've spent five years or more in France since Monday?

• You spin my blood right 'round, right 'round. Like a record, baby …

• Why does this saline have to be room temperature? Just nuke it for 30 seconds, guys. Or at least let me sit on it for a while.

• Prostituting my veins. Daddy would be so proud.

• Do I "want a squeeze ball"? Pervert.

• Someone's gonna get reeaal high off of that dude's plasma. If I ever need plasma, I hope I get his.

• Heh-heh. My plasma looks like pee.

• Sooo … why can't I just donate my pee? I'd make hella good money. I can totally pee more than twice a week. Like on Friday nights. On Friday nights I'd make bank.

• I hope I make it to that party on time.

• These beds are so uncomfortable. How's a lady supposed to take a nap in here?

— Trisha Spence pees out of her arm twice a week.













 
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