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ARIES (March 21-April 19): Don't let anyone stand in your way. Use your skills to get things accomplished. You may not please everyone but that's to be expected. Don't let the little things bother you. Changes in your living arrangements will be necessary.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Expect to experience some setbacks because of a lack of communication. Try to approach problems with compassion and understanding, but be prepared to clean house if you cannot come to terms with what's going on around you.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): You'll accomplish things if you travel or participate in a business event. You will make valuable connections because you are articulate. Include an older family member or someone you respect in your plans, and he or she will be an asset and will appreciate your thoughtfulness.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): A problem with an elder at work or in your family will turn into a burden if you take the bulk of the responsibilities yourself. Try to get help. You'll have trouble controlling your emotions, and this can result in nagging someone you love.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): You can stabilize a partnership that has been iffy by making a few concessions. Funds will become available if you invest or get involved in an innovative business venture. Plan an entertaining evening.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Use your creative talents to get ahead. Don't be afraid to make changes if it will help your financial position. You will have an excellent eye if you look for bargains. Go to flea markets, or attend auctions.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): You can have what you want if you use your intellect, charm, and sophistication. Your passionate approach to whatever you do will be well-received by both friends and colleagues. Your persuasive tactics will work when it comes to love and romance.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Expect your home and family life to be disrupted. Getting along, coupled with acceptance, is the key. Don't be afraid to ask for help. You'll be surprised how willing friends and relatives can be. Things are not as bad as you think.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Surround yourself with friends and family. Making alterations to your lifestyle will enhance important relationships. The way you do things around home will add to your comfort and security. Set a budget and stick to it.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Financial limitations because of poor investments or unforeseen expenses must be avoided. Listen to the advice of someone who is wise about money. Romance is highlighted. Do something nice for the one you love, and you will get the same in return.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Past goals and people you used to have common interests with will play an important role in your life now. Secure your financial situation by putting a strict budget in place. Don't let your emotions get in the way.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): You need to relax and get your mind off your work and your worries. You may want to contemplate a professional or residential move in the near future. Get involved in humanitarian groups.

 

 

 

 


Airplane Etiquette:

• Don't go to the bathroom before takeoff. The sink won't fully function, meaning you won't be able to wash your grimy little hands. Let's be blunt here: Nobody wants to touch either you or anything you've touched after wiping. Or peeing. (So, men, please please please wash up after peeing. You DO touch things. Don't lie.)

• Asking for no glass and no ice means you want the full can of soda. Don't try to be sneaky, people, we all know what you're up to. Just bat your eyes at the flight attendant and ask for the full can. Maybe if you're lucky, they'll throw in a pack of peanuts and a napkin printed with advertisements.

• Don't ask for some sort of crazy mixed drink. It's a flight attendant, not a cocktail waitress. They should be teaching you how to put on an emergency oxygen mask, not making you Parisian-style Mojitos.

• If you have to toot, go to the lavatory. Otherwise, the confined space and recirculated air turns every toot into a micro version of Outbreak.

• Turn your Beats by Dre headphones down a notch or four. Or else someone might make you black and yellow, black and yellow, black and yellow.

• Don't hit on a girl when you can clearly see that she is on a family vacation. Trust me, you should wait longer than 10 seconds after first seeing and staring at her butt before meeting her parents.

• If you have kids who kick and scream, give them Dramamine. Please, for the sake of everyone else on the flight, give them Dramamine. And fudge-up the dose a little if it'll help, too.













 
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