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ARIES (March 21-April 19): Use your knowledge and skills to help others, and you will secure a position that will reward you handsomely. It’s how you go about doing things that will make a difference to your future. Love and romance are in the stars.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Don’t get caught up in someone else’s melodrama, or you will miss out on a life-changing opportunity. Give someone a gentle nudge if it will make a difference to a cause or group you believe in. A debate will favor you in the end, so speak up.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Look, listen, and learn. Back away from anyone putting demands on you, and embrace those eager to see what you’ll do next. There will be a fine line between someone who is your enemy and someone who is jealous of you.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Put your best foot forward. Your memory, coupled with your imagination, will help you come up with excellent ideas that will please whoever you are doing business with or trying to impress. A move will help cut costs.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): A chance to expand your interests, skills, or your friendships is apparent if you get involved in a group endeavor or an educational pursuit. Your willingness to share will help you gain momentum while learning and applying the information you’ve picked up.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Take care of money matters or debts owed. Change is required in order to follow your dreams and find the happiness you’ve been longing for. You can enhance your love life by the choices you make now.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): New beginnings are within reach. Stop worrying about what isn’t working, and focus more on what you want to see happen. It’s up to you to motivate people who can help you out to participate in your plans.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): You can make a difference in someone’s life if you inspire, educate, and facilitate her or him to join your quest. A change at home will enable you to expand an idea or plan you’ve wanted to develop for some time. Communication and action will bring results.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Your past can get you into trouble if you aren’t respectful of your current obligations. A problem with a friend, relative, or neighbor will lead to a dispute. Changes to the way you live will help you get back on track.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Being able to adapt to whatever situation you face will enhance your reputation. You will have the opportunity to take on added responsibility or a leadership position. A change in your personal life will bring you greater happiness.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Taking on too much or trying to be too many things for too many people will lead to exhaustion. Don’t make promises or sign up for anything that isn’t going to bring you something in return.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Before you tell everyone your plans, research the possibilities as well as your options. A personal change will alter the way you feel about someone. Don’t make an impulsive move.

 

 

 

 


Overheard at my Oscars party:

• “Wow, James Franco is really pretty good at holding it together when he’s stoned out of his mind.”

• “Young Randy Newman looked like Elvis Costello. Old Randy Newman looks like Dick Cheney.”

• “In all my many, many years of watching movies, I have never once left a theater thinking ‘Man, that movie really deserves an Oscar for Sound Mixing.’ ”

• “Why is Christopher Walken pretending to be Billy Crystal?”

• “Meh. Gwyneth Paltrow is a country-music star in the same way that YooHoo is chocolate milk.”

• “Who did Annette Bening’s hair — Hurricane Katrina?”

• “Celine Dion? I’d rather hear Gwyneth Paltrow again.”

• “Damn you, Wally Pfister. Why couldn’t your first name have been Willy?”

• “Do you think Anne Hathaway is changing dresses between every segment just to make James Franco think he’s really tripping?”

• “Why is Best Director being presented by transvestites? Wait … that’s Hilary Swank.”

• “Is Geoffrey Rush playing Mr. Slate in a remake of *The Flintstones* or something?”

• “Hah. They misspelled Biutiful.”

• I have a theory that nobody actually saw *The King’s Speech*. They just knew that it was boring, dry, and British, and they automatically assumed it was a classic.













 
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