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ARIES (March 21-April 19): Open up about the way you feel and about what you’d like to see happen. Giving in to someone’s selfish needs will not make you feel good about who you are. Focus on what really matters to you and your community.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): If you aren’t willing to do your share, how can you expect others to? Explain to others what is wrong and what can make things right for the organization or people you are concerned about. An interesting partnership will develop.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): You’ll be faced with both negative and positive reactions and must be prepared to sway the people who don’t agree with you. Your unusual way of expressing what you want should help you secure the foothold you need to proceed with your plans.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Speak up if you want to correct misinformation that is circulating. Don’t be afraid of change to your status or your professional goals. Nothing is as bad as it seems if you put in time and effort.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Look for an unusual opportunity to raise your income. There is money to be made if you decide to buy, sell, or invest in something you believe in. A change of plans may be unnerving, but it will bring greater insight.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): View your glass as half-full, and put your imagination to work for you. The ideas you come up with will help to buffer some of the financial losses you have incurred. Nothing is out of reach if you put your mind to it.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): You will be able to develop a good working relationship with someone who has the potential to bring what you are lacking to the project. Spontaneity will allow you to bring attention to your plans and gain the help you will need.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Not everyone will be as intuitive as you are. The possibilities are endless if you stay on course and prepare for the changes to your personal life that have been on your mind for some time. A move is evident.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): A romantic problem can cloud your vision, causing you to backtrack and second-guess what you are doing. Don’t let anyone slow you down. A residential move will help solve some problems.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Don’t give in to someone else’s nastiness. Travel plans will lead to delays, and they should be put on hold, if possible. Less will turn out to be more when it comes to an explanation you must make.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Take a long, hard look at your goals, and if you aren’t happy with what you see, it may be time to rediscover what you have to offer. New beginnings are always difficult, but they can be exciting and rewarding as well.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Talk to someone in a position of power about a project you want to pursue. An unusual way of dealing with a partnership will be a means to get what you want. Approach someone you used to rely on for insight.

 

 

 

 


What we learned at the Des Moines Blank Park Zoo (and why we’re not allowed back)

• They do not rent out their animals.

• It’s true: The lions really don’t get along well with the lambs.

• … or with the other lions when there’s not enough lamb to go around.

• Neither of us can fit inside a kangaroo’s pouch.

• Kangaroos punch as hard as they do in the cartoons, but they lack the padded, professional boxing gloves.

• … and Nathan’s pretty sure kangaroos know how to flip the bird.

• The zoo will not take a donation in the form of Andrew’s neighbor’s yippy Labradoodle.

• Although Nathan is definitely “faster than a speeding zoo tram,” he is most certainly NOT “more powerful than a zoo tram” nor “able to leap tall zoo trams in a single bound.”

• Coyotes have never heard of ACME, but they sure will chase a roadrunner.

• … especially if you lash live rabbits to the roadrunners’ backs.

• While it is true that the majestic Northern White Rhinoceros is officially extinct in the wild, it is also true that it tastes best with a light hollandaise sauce.

• An alpaca will spit in your face if you so much as look at them funny.

• … or try to ride them

• … especially if you’re wearing spurs.

• Andrew can start a tour group by simply wearing khakis and a nametag, then signaling people to follow him.

• Monkeys like to fling poo, but do not like having it flung back at them.









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