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ARIES (March 21-April 19): Favors are highlighted. Take on a physical challenge that will boost your confidence and get you moving. Dealing with children and elders will give you greater insight into subjects that you can use to help you get ahead.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): You are wasting time if you think someone is going to come along and do things for you. Get the ball rolling, and you will attract the help you need. Trust your own skills and aptitude.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Mixing business with pleasure will help you formulate an effective plan for advancement. Your timing is good with regard to work, creativity, and getting your plans off the ground. Talks will lead to productivity and a new direction.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Call the shots before someone else tries to. Make it clear that you cannot be pushed or coerced into anything you don’t want to do. Once you have established your position, you can follow your own path successfully.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Concentrate on what you need to do to get what you want. You can entice people to follow you by using your charm and finding unique ways to entertain. Recognition and success can be yours if you are industrious.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): You have just as much to offer as anyone else and can probably do a better job if you put your mind to it. Invest in yourself. A social activity that involves a challenge will allow you to show what you are capable of accomplishing.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Networking and attending social gatherings will bring you in contact with people who can help you get ahead. A partnership can be developed with someone who has common interests and can offer you greater knowledge and experience.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): A sudden, unexpected change will help you turn something small that you’ve been working on into something big. You’ll get plenty of interest in what you are doing, but be careful not to fall for someone’s slick offer.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You’ll face criticism as well as praise. Don’t let either influence what you are trying to accomplish. An old friendship can mislead you when you least expect. Try to make your own decisions.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Refuse to let anyone sidetrack you. Avoid get-rich-quick schemes. You operate best when you feel safe and secure, so don’t step into a lifestyle that will cause you to live on the edge.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Your energetic attitude will create a stir. Your interest in what everyone is doing and the possibilities that exist will lead to new friends and plenty of excitement. You can enhance your financial situation by giving a new look to an old idea.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): You may get offers that are hard to resist, but if you aren’t well-versed in what’s being asked of you, don’t agree to the conditions. You have to make sure you will be successful before you engage in something that could affect your reputation adversely.





Amazing, but true (but not)

• Talcum powder is made by grinding penguin teeth into a fine dust.

• Toe jam is chemically indistinguishable from cocaine.

• Mercury midday gets up to 800 degrees Fahrenheit, which is hotter than Hell (only 600 degrees Fahrenheit).

• Dick Cheney personally decommissioned the Six Million Dollar Man; NASA mechanics believe the spare parts are what allowed him to complete a second term.

• Truck nuts are actually made by bronzing the nuts from gelded horses.

• East Asians switched the order of their family and given names during the second Opium War to confuse and evade Western militias. Today, the only purpose it serves is making the Westerners who understand the difference insufferable to Westerners who don’t.

• Mason jars are rarely made with anything more than 22 percent post-consumer masons.

• In keeping with historical accuracy, U.S. law prohibits converting $1 bills into British pounds.

• Australians use a different calendar system than the rest of the world; their year consists of 73 five-day weeks and does not use months. Every fourth year, to compensate for leap year, everyone’s birthday lasts for 48 hours.

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