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ARIES (March 21-April 19): Getting help may be difficult. You are usually so self-sufficient that no one ever thinks about what you might need. Don’t despair; just broaden your time line so you don’t feel as pressured.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Take on extra tasks, and show everyone how capable you can be when something needs to get done. You will fool someone who has been trying to take advantage of you by moving ahead in silence and presenting your finished project before the deadline.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): A relationship can lead to setbacks if you neglect your responsibilities. Take care of business, or someone who wants to make you look bad will take advantage of your shortcomings. Last-minute changes will save your reputation and position.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): If you are willing to put in your two-cents worth, you will get what’s owed to you in return. Your ideas will be considered by someone looking to make long-term changes. You can position yourself to develop and oversee the venture.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Get involved in something you believe in, and you will make a great connection that will help you out personally and professionally. A money-making scheme may not be all it’s made out to be. Maintain a tight budget and a good savings plan.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): As much as you think you have a handle on a situation you face, you probably do not. A loved one will disappoint you if you let her or him make a decision that will affect you as well. Change is inevitable.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Follow your intuition, not what someone else is trying to persuade you to do. An emotional issue can be put to rest with compassion and a firm hand. Your strength, belief, and experience will make others bend to your requests.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): You may want to cover your back and avoid anyone trying to coerce you into doing something you don’t feel good about. Talks and putting pen to paper will allow you to come up with an agreement that you can live with.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Take on a new challenge, and you will get to know someone who has had experiences that can help you resolve your current situations. An interesting relationship will develop, leading to more than just a friendship.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Problems with legal concerns, contracts, or finances can be brought to the attention of whoever is causing you grief and can be resolved. Your stamina and ability to get things done will help you force issues.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Put your heart and soul on the line, and you will get a response that will heighten your feelings, allowing you to make some essential alterations to your home and lifestyle. Don’t get angry if someone tries to stand in your way — but do refuse to budge.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Keep a relationship you are interested in starting under wraps for now. Love is on the rise, but before you can let a romance develop, you must get your life in order and problems with past partners resolved.





20 movies I might have thought were porno flicks, based solely their titles:

by Andrew Juhl

• Free Willy

• The Black Stallion

• The Dirty Dozen

• Double Impact

• Freaky Friday

• How to Be Very Very Popular

• Anaconda

• I’ll Cry Tomorrow

• I’m No Angel

• Jersey Girl

• Mister Johnson

• In Her Shoes {Fetish}

• Money Train

• Oklahoma Crude

• The Hot Box

• The Magnificent Seven

• Bachelor Party

• Big Daddy

• Diary of a Mad Housewife

• Dick

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