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ARIES (March 21-April 19): Don’t get dragged into someone else’s argument. You have too much at stake to be meddling in affairs that shouldn’t concern you. Focus on your own problems and how much you can accomplish.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): The task you need to complete will keep you busy. Don’t waste time — you will be the one who looks bad if you haven’t done your fair share. Love is likely to take you by surprise.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): You have a lot to offer. Implement your many creative talents into whatever job you are given. There is a good chance you’ll have the opportunity to make a move physically, professionally or emotionally, but it may have a negative effect on someone who loves you.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Leave your troubles behind you. Don’t labor over what’s happened when you have so much in front of you to deal with. A change will be good for you in terms of the connections you make.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): You may want to get away. Make plans with a good friend you trust on whom you can rely for good advice concerning love and money. Reconsider a relationship you have with someone who is forever asking for something.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Serious talks will bring results, but you may not like what you hear. It’s important to put the past behind you. Your options are mounting where professional gains are concerned, so don’t allow yourself to be held back emotionally.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): You can’t go wrong if you stick to what you know. Your entertaining and persuasive way of getting your point across will help you get what you want. It will be difficult for anyone to say no to you.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): You have some adjustments to make at home and to your personal life. You can put some thought, plans, and hard work into finishing something you started a long time ago. Renovations will make someone you love happy.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): A partnership will enable you to do far more in terms of travel, expansion, and making more money. A change in your personal life will free up time to further your goals.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Don’t settle when you don’t have to. You have so much to gain by holding your ground and sticking to your game plan. You can make some serious changes at home that will help you emphasize your plans for the future.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Socializing will lead to meeting someone who can offer you concrete ideas for raising your earning power. Talks and negotiations will go well if you put your ideas on the table and talk numbers to someone you feel might make a decent partner.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): You may feel stifled by someone who has a different idea regarding your relationship. Set the record straight so that you don’t encounter problems later on. Someone from your past may still be on your mind. Find out what this person is doing.





The Ledge Commandments:

by Andrew Juhl

• Thou shalt attempteth to entirely fill the column space.

• Thou shalt attempteth to entirely fill the column space *with jokes*.

• Thou shalt attempteth to conservatively split infinitives.

• Thou shalt observeth rigorously the 3 p.m. deadline, unless thou arte traveling, arte having a hella-busy day, or arte in a general screw-it-all-type of mood.

• Thou shalt observe the advertisers by keeping them wholly … un-insulted.

• Thou shalt feeleth free to insult everyone else, and frequently.

• Thou shalt insulteth thyself slightly more frequently, thus creating an impenetrable shield of self-detriment.

• Thou shalt not be overtly libelous with thine insults, unless thou is being really funny.

• Thou shalt include verbs in all sentences. All sentences.

• Thou shalt not overly rely on the spell chequer.

• Thou shalt use correct punctuation and be comma-happy (within, reason).

• Thou shalt acknowledge / the great many readers who / don’t enjoy Haiku.

• Thou shalt not make jokes about having sex with thine girlfriend on days where thine girlfriend is likely to read thine column.

• Thou shalt fact-check, when applicable, and useth credible sources, rather than Wikipedia and thine much smarter roommate (who also just useth Wikipedia).

• Thou shalt not writeth Ledges about writing Ledges.

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