New Feature! Sudoku below Horoscopes and Ledge, play online or print it out!

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Your precision coupled with detail will help you show everyone why you reign supreme. Set your goals and standards high, and you will find peace of mind. Your experience will outshine impersonators and impostors.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Your knowledge and experience depends on interacting with people from different backgrounds who can inspire and motivate you. A serious approach and in-depth talks will help you stabilize your life.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Don’t give in to a bully, but do listen to someone offering wise suggestions. Love is on the rise, and by getting involved in something you enjoy, you will enhance the relationship you are already in or meet someone new.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): You have to be proactive in order to maintain what you have worked so hard to accumulate. An older or more experienced individual will shed light on a situation you face. Don’t let someone who claims to love you push you.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Problems with authority will require you to make a fast decision. Do what’s in your heart and you won’t be disappointed. Your knowledge and past experience will come in handy when it comes to professional gains.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Be upfront — don’t hold back if something is bothering you. A change in finances will occur. Whether it is positive or negative will depend on how you handle the situation. A clean slate will help you get ahead in the future.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): There are skeletons in the closet that must be let out. A money proposition will help you get a handle on your financial situation. Make sure you aren’t repeating a mistake you made once before.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Your creative plans will allow you to undermine someone who has been working hard to hold you back. A new partnership will bring you added strength and the ability to use positive force in order to get your way.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): An emotional problem will influence your work performance if you aren’t careful. A sudden change at home will leave you wondering what to do next. Seek advice from someone with more experience or insight.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): You can successfully apply for a loan or close a deal or even ask for a debt to be repaid. A chance to work from home may entice you, but chances are good that you’ll miss important details if you do.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Consider a partnership with someone a little older and with more experience. You can incorporate your originality and youthful outlook. Your charm will help you win favors as well as bring about a new friendship.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): A change of heart by someone you have worked with in the past will allow you to move forward with an old idea. Be open to suggestions, and you can come up with workable solutions for any problems. Compromise will pay off.





Love is …

by Andrew Juhl

• Love is getting to third base on a first date.

• Love is ignoring them for all their faults, unless they’re goyim.

• Love is refusing to corroborate allegations with eyewitness testimony.

• Love is inspiring a Pro/Con list between keeping you and getting a fish.

• Love is waiting until she is really, really drunk to ask about the threesome with her best friend.

• Love is waiting until he is really, really drunk to ask about the threesome with his best friend.

• Love is forever, until a younger, sexier ingénue replaces you in the sequel.

• Love is monosyllabic.

• Love is irrationality, causing people to do insane things, such as committing murder or getting married.

• Love is SUBTLE.

• Love is watching only six hours of football on a Sunday because she’s being a bitch about it.

• Love is cleaning the toilet with his toothbrush and not telling him because he’s watching football again.

• Love is Amway for STDs.

• Love is a kitten: cute and warm when it’s young, but eventually you come home to find a big pile of puke in your shoes.

• Love is *bold*.

• Love is a bad taco fart, often lingering longer than you ever expected it to.

• Love is tracking very closely with the consumer confidence index.

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