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ARIES (March 21-April 19): You can’t wait for others to do things — it’s crucial that you do what needs to be done on your own. Put everything else on hold, and focus on the most important things in your life.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): You don’t have to be open about what you are planning to do. Surprise everyone with your actions and your plans. A short trip to have a one-on-one conversation will pay off.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Don’t give in to what everyone else thinks or wants to do. Follow your own ideas, and if that means opening up new friendships, that’s what you have to do. You can’t let anyone hold you back.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Making a residential move, changing jobs, or even just doing things a little differently at home will make your life easier. Assess your situation, and act accordingly. Don’t wait for someone else to do it for you.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Love may be up for grabs or a relationship you are in can take a turn for the best. Plan a trip that brings you in contact with someone you miss. Looking back will help you realize what you have and what you want.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Anxiety is likely to develop if you are involved in personal talks or partnership disputes. If you at least listen, you will have a better understanding of what needs to be done. You don’t have to give in but you do have to find a solution.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Don’t get too caught up in what’s happening at work or with your peers. Keep things light, and concentrate on your personal life. Getting involved in a creative hobby or self-improvement will bring the highest rewards.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): You’ve got too much going for you to give in to someone’s complaints. If you need to get out of the house in order to achieve peace of mind, do so. You have something good in the works, and you mustn’t let anyone stifle your plans.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Don’t make a move unless you want to backtrack. Sit tight, and wait to see what everyone else does first. Sudden changes at home or with friendships may be alarming, but in the end, you will realize that it’s probably time for you to move on.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Look for something new to do, and you will make money doing it. You are on a roll, and you will be able to pull things together quickly. Don’t let a new acquaintance get you all worked up when you probably should take a pass.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Hard work will pay off. Someone from your past will make a difference in your life now. The lessons you’ve learned will keep you on the right track. Love is in the stars.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Everything appears to be up in the air. Turn this into an advantage by letting other people’s uncertainties be your strength. Before you know it, you will be the one calling the shots. It’s confidence that will lead to success.

 

 

 

 


Real-Life Bosses, Video-Game Bosses, both, or neither?

by Andrew Juhl


• It’s best to know their weaknesses and to have a good strategy in mind *before* each time you encounter them. (Both.)

• If you’re crafty enough, there’s usually some way around them altogether. (Real-Life Bosses.)

• It makes you happy when the same one confronts you for the five times in a single hour. (Neither.)

• You are often rewarded with money and power for devastating them. (Video-Game Bosses.)

• If subduing one seems a little too easy, chances are it’ll pop again later and be at least twice as hard to get rid of the next time. (Both.)

• They can fire you for writing inappropriate articles in the university newspaper. (Real-Life Bosses.)

• You often can (and should) make fun of how they are dressed. (Both.)

• They don’t particularly care if you haven’t showered for a few days and are covered with cookie crumbs and cat hair. (Video-Game Bosses.)

• Losing a battle with one may cause you to repeat hours of tedious work. (Both.)

• Can often be taken down by a single ballistic missile. (Real-Life Bosses.)

• If male, they are often incredibly fat and/or very muscular. (Both.)

• If female, they are often incredibly sexy and/or very sexy. (Video-Game Bosses.)

• As you continue to progress, they become bigger pains in the ass. (Both.)

• They get mad when you all you do is play video games. (Real-Life Bosses.)

• Sometimes they make you so mad you want to throw a controller at them. (Both.)

• They are often evil aliens, hellish monsters, hardhearted bullies, or soulless robots. (Both.)

• There’s nothing quite as satisfying as giving one a good, well-timed punch in the face. (Both.)









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